#A
There was a woman who wanted to run a restaurant and a man who only liked looking for goodrestaurants. They were in university, studying the same major. But the man had a third try before entering the university, so, he was a three-year difference with the woman. The woman was born and raised in the city, the man was born and raised in the countryside and went out to the city to go to college.
They had nothing in common, but they tried to get close and get to know each other with the common interest of “food.” The woman said she wanted to open a restaurant one day, and the man promised the woman that he would do so together in the future. The woman, of course, believed it.
After graduating from university, the man and woman got jobs in different cities. The woman worked hard at the company, but it was hard to adjust.
She had an illness of the mind. It’s a secret even to herself, so she was living pretending she didn’t know. But very occasionally, that illness of the mind appealed to herself to look at her.
Somehow, she completely ignored such a voice. And sometimes she drew pictures. She was talented and smart.She passed every certification exam in one time and had multiple certificates. But she was not happy.
Wanting to travel, the woman decided to go to the man. Without calling, she flew by plane to the street where the man was. The winter snow was blown away by strong winds and it was hard to open eyes. At the airport, the woman called the man and the man welcomed her. The woman wanted this man to like her, but sometimes she was feeling tired when she was together with him.
The man was a gourmet, so he took the woman to a famous restaurant. They had to wait their turn because there were so many people, but the woman was tired. Frankly She wanted to rest for some reason, but she was careful that an illness of the mind might be discovered. This was a woman’s pride that ‘I never have a problem’. The man took the woman to a delicious restaurant or a famous place to entertain her. The man was satisfied with himself. The woman appreciated the man’s consideration and tenderness, and at that moment she felt loved.
The woman realized that she had spent a long time with this man.After flying back to the street where she lived, the woman felt intense loneliness and lonesomeness.
The company’s important project began from tomorrow. The woman felt that her mission was important, but she wanted to go far away. She thought she was doing well with other colleagues in the company without any problems. Nevertheless, the woman was hurt when she saw a colleague who joined the company being promoted to a higher position than her. So, in this project, the woman had the pressure to show something.
#B
As the project began, her daily life began to change.
All privacy disappeared and she tried to support the team.
She was distressed by her exhausted body and mind.
The woman called to want to be consoled by the man.
The man said.
“That’s what company life is like, try your best to show your ability.”
The woman hung up the phone and decided again to be careful not to quickly reveal her illness of the mind, even though she thought she was lonely.
Looking at the clear blue sky, she thought it was pretty.
The woman decided not to meet her friends anymore.
Because she knew that when she met them, she always felt like she was losing.
Woman didn’t want to feel that way even though they weren’t competing.
Looking at the blue sky, the woman said goodbye to the man.
There was no meaning in going out with him, she thought.
The man persuaded the woman that he was trying to open a restaurant with her someday.
She couldn’t believe what the man said, but she pretended to believe it because she was lonely.
Something was getting wrong, she thought.
However, she just turned away for fear of finding out about her illness of the mind.
She couldn’t stand the company’s work and ended up quitting the company.
She called the man and told him about it.
The man was disappointed that the woman easily quit the hard-entered company.
But the man said he loved her.
The woman cried under the blanket for a long time that night because of loneliness and solitude.
The woman started a part-time job at a cafe. It was a cafe that served various foods.
The woman was gradually regaining her vitality.
For the first time, she thought the work was enjoyable.
One day her family, mother and elder sister, visited her.
She didn’t welcome her family’s visit, but she didn’t express that.
She had to show her family that she had no problem at all.
When she met her family, the woman felt distressed.
Because when talking to her family, she always felt that she was being pointed out for what she lacked.
That made her sad. So, she decided not to contact her family.
The man told the woman not to, but he was not interested in the reason.
Looking at the sky and thinking the white clouds were beautiful, she felt lonely.
So, she went to the park. Then an old man approached.
The woman burst into tears in spite of herself.
Tears poured down constantly.
The old man looked at it for a long time without saying anything.
When the woman stopped crying, the old man smiled and said it was fine.
And old man told her to do what she wanted without thinking about anything else.
“It’s a simple thing, but we’re living without knowing it.” saying, and he went far away.
#C
The woman made up her mind, doing what she wanted to do.
The woman started attending the pottery class because she wanted to make pottery.
Thinking of putting food in the pottery she made, it made her feel happy.
And she always tried not to reveal her illness of the mind.
The woman played the piano very well. But she never played the piano in front of people.
For the woman, the piano was not a beautiful sound instrument, but a competing tool.
Elder sister was always praised by people around her for playing the piano better than the woman.
The girl was hurt, and no one knew her hurt.
She thought it was okay, though.
She thought it would have been nice if they hadn’t found out about her illness of the mind.
The woman thought she was having a hard time when she was with her family.
So, she went far away. But saudade remained deep in the woman’s heart.
The woman thought she was lonely.
The blue sky was just consoling her.
The woman couldn’t remember from when she wanted to do a restaurant.
That’s how time went.
The woman called the man. She said she enjoyed working at the cafe.
The man pretended to be interested and only talked about his story and the difficulties of his work.
And at the end of the phone call, he said he loved her like a habit.
The woman knew. The man didn’t love the woman anymore.
The woman thought she had to live for herself.
While hiding one’s illness of the mind.
One day, the man came to see the woman.
The woman was a little pleased by the sudden visit of the man.
The man was happy to say that he had been promoted.
The woman also pretended to be happy, but she felt lonely.
The man only talked about the company and took the woman to the restaurant he discovered.
The woman felt tired, but she thought she should be careful because it was an illness of the mind.
But the woman was tired. She wanted to go home.
Where there was no one. Not even the blue sky could comfort her that day.
#D
The woman baked the pottery with enthusiasm
At that moment, she could immerse herself in her world without interference from anyone.
Looking at the baked pottery, the woman could feel a little free.
However, the woman’s family did not evaluate the pottery made by the woman.
They said it wasn’t a professional work. It was a predictable reaction for the woman.
But this time, the woman plucked up the courage and said, “I’m happy when I bake pottery.”
Still, the woman’s family was only cynical. The woman was hurt again.
This time, she thought she had to run away from where she was now.
She told the man on the phone that she wanted to break up.
She also expressed her intention to join the Youth Overseas Cooperation Team and go abroad.
In the book that the woman read,
the simple sentence that experiencing a wider world could eliminate prejudice was impressive.
For the first time, the woman thought of wanting to cure her illness of the mind.
The man called the woman. He said he didn’t want to break up.
The man said he wanted to marry the woman, saying opening a restaurant together, he lied simply.
The woman thanked the man for saying that.
But the woman knew it was not love. The woman was just lonely.
The woman felt unconsciously that she was gradually forgetting how to walk alone.
The man and the woman married in elegance at a nice restaurant in the city center.
The woman tried hard to make money to open a restaurant while living with the man.
But the woman did not make much money because of her illness of the mind.
The man said it was okay and kept telling her that he had no money, so now he had to work hard to do a restaurant.
The woman was tired.
The woman was gradually forgetting even what she wanted to do.
The man was gradually promoted. And the woman felt she was getting smaller.
The man said there was nothing in the world that was not difficult.
The woman was hurt. And from a certain moment, the cracks in the woman’s mind grew.
The woman tried not to be found out. As if nothing was going on.
And when someone asked if she was okay, she said more than necessary, “It’s okay, there’s nothing wrong with it.”
One day, the woman found out that the man had another woman.
When she found out, the woman received the news as if the time had come rather than a shock.
On the other hand, it seemed that all the things that had been kept until now were collapsing.
The woman did not love the man. The man didn’t love the woman, either.
No, there was no such thing as love from the beginning
The woman bitterly regretted why she got married
#E
The woman worked hard at her part-time job during those hard days.
She tried to live as if nothing had happened, hoping everything would go well.
She didn’t want people around her to know that the man had another woman.
Like wanting to hide her illness of the mind.
And she thought that she could endure a man’s change of mind, which was not this kind of love, for quite a long time.
The woman knew that it was inevitable that a hurtful agreement would be reached.
And she wanted to quietly ignore it.
Still, the woman was saddened by the unbearable loneliness.
One day, the man asked the woman for a divorce.
The woman thought he was shameless and refused to divorce him.
She knew that the man’s heart left her,
but there was no reason why she should be exposed to this absurdity and respond to it.
And an unknown whisper began to be heard in the woman’s ear.
One day, it was known to the world that the man had another woman.
Everyone in the world began to say she was pitiful.
But the woman was somehow hurt by what was known to the world.
She couldn’t bear people’s eyes directed at her because she became pitiful.
The man was criticized, but he did his job with a nonchalant face.
The man was more disturbed by the reproach he had received than by the woman’s wound.
The man said he was breaking up with another woman, but the woman didn’t believe him.
The woman just wanted to get out of this situation.
She came to think that she wanted to live in a world where she didn’t know anyone.
When she tried to go somewhere else, the man tried to appease the woman.
He didn’t love her, but he had a belief that he didn’t want to make the problem bigger.
The man tried to go around the restaurant again with the woman as before.
He tried to please the woman by creating an event.
But the woman’s mind went far away, so she begged him to stop the event anymore.
The woman was becoming unable to hide her illness of the mind, and the whisper was constantly chasing her.
But she thought she never wanted to show this man her illness of the mind.
The man may have known the woman’s illness of the mind at some point.
It didn’t know if he turned a blind eye with consideration, was indifferent, or ignorant.
The woman thought that it was a fairy tale story for men and women to meet and start love, to feel happy, and to build a life.
The woman gave up the happiness given by love, and she wanted to live a life that would have a good meaning even if it wasn’t.
The woman looked at the blue sky and wanted to be comforted, but she was so tired.
And she said to the man, “Let’s get divorced, I won’t tell you to dream the same thing anymore.
“We have been walking a different path from the beginning.” the woman cried as she told the man.
The woman heard a whisper in her ear.
The woman shook her head to shake off the sound.
The woman who wanted to hide her illness of the mind tried to leave the man.
#F
Up to this point the woman tried to commit suicide twice, which ended in an attempt.
In response to the woman’s firm determination,
the man agreed the woman to live in another area on the condition that the man did not divorce.
There was an indelible thick and gloomy wall between the two, but the man still did not divorce the woman.
The man did not understand the woman, and the woman did not trust the man.
The woman came to the new city and looked for a new part-time job.
She started a job that she was not interested in because she thought she should do a higher-paying job.
The woman tried to do her best, telling herself, “That’s fine.”
The woman felt like she was fighting a fate stronger than her plan.
Fate seemed to laugh at the woman when she could not beat it.
While baking pottery, the woman found her way and tried to live.
The man visited the woman at the end of the month.
Seeing the man who thought it was a sense of duty, the woman was a little comforted, but the woman did not trust the man.
She thought that the whispers she heard were disturbing, so the woman put earplugs on her ears.
Not to reveal her illness of the mind, she needed more attention, the woman thought.
The woman just came here because she was exhausted.
Sitting on the bench and looking at the blue sky, the woman recalled that she had a dream, too.
“Where did my dream go, my dream,” a whisper came from deep in her ear.
The woman worked hard to bake the pottery.
Her talent shone, but her gaze faded, and her eyes were cast in doubt.
The woman was nervous and angry at the repeated ups and downs of her emotions.
She heard a small voice somewhere that she wanted to be comfortable now.
The sound was a moment when she heard it and felt like an unknown sense of fear.
The woman did not think that the man broke up with another woman.
At first, another woman often sent personal e-mails to the man.
The woman happened to read it on a computer.
It was written that the man looked cool working at the company, and such e-mails were sent to him frequently.
And the woman felt betrayed by the slovenly appearance of the man dealing with it.
She didn’t want to say that it was a common penny pool between a man and a woman.
She came to think that it was a rude thing, an unforgivable thing that happened to her.
A man and a woman who did not love ended up living completely apart from each other, leaving only the name of a married couple.
#G
The woman liked to be alone.
She was lonely, but she thought it was comfortable not to ask for love.
Whispering in her ears endlessly, but the woman could bear it.
She spent every day thinking that she just wanted time to pass by.
The woman got used to the life of an unfamiliar street little by little.
One day, the woman’s family suddenly came.
The woman didn’t like it, but she greeted them kindly.
The woman’s family said that if she lived alone like this, it would be easier for the man to get along with other women.
And they said without hesitation that even if she got divorced, she should get enough alimony because it was the man’s fault.
The woman thought. “Who are these people?”
The woman told them not to visit her anymore.
The woman cried under the blanket that night feeling lonely.
On the other hand, it was the most enjoyable time for the woman because her pottery work was not disturbed.
For that time, even the illness of the mind was quiet without showing up around the woman.
On a very normal Sunday, the woman left the workshop and went to the park.
The cool wind blew, and the autumn sky was high.
An airplane was flying over the vast sky.
The woman thought it was a peaceful sky, and she wanted to fly far away.
And the woman suddenly thought she didn’t want to try, try, and try to live hard any longer. She just wanted to be free.
Everything came suddenly.
The woman sent the man an e-mail saying that she wanted to divorce, and that she didn’t need alimony.
At this moment, the woman thought she was happy because there was a blue sky.
It was too simple reason. And the woman called the hospital to see a doctor.
From the man, there was no answer.
Next day she went to the hospital early in the morning.
She talked to the doctor for a long time and “Let’s try our best to treat it.” said the doctor. She shed unidentified tears.
The woman stopped doing things that were high paid but not suitable for her aptitude.
Then she went to the workshop. There was a glimmer of hope on the woman’s face.
The man’s answer did not come, but the woman was determined.
Everyone was excited about the talk that the workshop teacher would hold an exhibition in Taiwan.
The workshop teacher asked the woman to support this exhibition.
The woman hesitated because she wanted to hide her illness of the mind.
This was because she was worried about living in Taiwan for a month.
However, when she was young and more courageous, she remembered that she wanted to go to a Youth Overseas Cooperation Team.
So she decided to accept the teacher’s proposal.
After making the decision, she felt something exciting in her heart.
A small whisper was heard in the woman’s ear.
The woman said, it’s all right.
Three days later, the woman got an e-mail from the man asking for a divorce.
The woman tried to be calm, but her loneliness rose, and tears poured out.
And two months later, the woman headed to Taiwan for an exhibition with a workshop teacher and several staff members.
She thought the blue sky was beautiful and she wanted to fly.
And five years have passed.
The woman was placing pottery coffee cups and bowls side by side on a long shelf in a small cafe.
The cafe in the middle of the hillside in the exotic port city was filled with coffee flavor.
This was a pottery cafe that has been run by the woman for three years.
Affordable pottery was displayed and sold in a cute manner.
The woman was now middle-aged and devoted herself to this cafe.
In particular, her coffee cups were so popular that orders came from far away.
The woman still went to the hospital. There was no more fear, and she was feeling free.
She had two cats.
It was named Cheshire and Alice.
Because when Alice in Wonderland got lost,
the Cheshire cat taught her, “If you keep going without stopping where you want to go, you can reach somewhere.”
Alice never gets lost because she has Cheshire.
The woman walks silently on the path she has to go, without stopping on the path that the blue sky teaches her.
End
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